Would it kill you to educate yourself?

… instead of telling others what to do or think, that is? The content of this post might seem upsetting to certain readers. If you or someone you know struggle with suicidal ideation, or if you’ve lost someone to suicide, reader discretion is advised. If you’re in the UK, you can find one or more of the following links useful: Suicide Prevention UK, Men’s Minds Matter or Find a Helpline (this last one lists most, if not all, of the helplines in the UK).

If you’re in Norway, however, they’ve still got their heads buried so deep in the sand trying to pretend that everything’s fine, that there’s no helpline with competent professionals handling the phones. No one to reach out to, who won’t first inform you that they will have to let the authorities know if they suspect you’re at risk of endangering yourself or those around you. No one who will just sit and listen while you empty your head of those toxic thoughts that never seem to stop, without telling you how sad your pain is making them feel. Thus, no links, as I don’t think they’d be helpful.

If you’re lucky, though, there are some beyond decent GPs in this country, who can and will help if prompted. So, if you feel as if you’re not being taken seriously – and can handle the required research to find the right GP – it might be worth looking into a swap.

This past Thursday, the 10th, marked yet another World Suicide Prevention Day. You can read more about it on the International Association for Suicide Prevention (IASP)’s website by clicking on that link, but if you don’t know why there’s a whole day dedicated to prevent people from diving head-first into the abyss – this advocacy and communication event was established in 2003, in conjunction with WHO, to make the world understand that suicide can be prevented. Here’s a thought; why don’t you use that day to educate yourselves on mental health matters, rather than telling everyone else to “check on their mentally challenged friend and/or relative” on the one day of the year they might actually want to be left the fuck alone?

I’ve written about this topic on numerous occasions – hell, you can even read about it in my book – but, unfortunately, it seems to stay relevant. Thus, here we are again. I am writing about it today for two reasons:

1: What I saw on social media on the day made me want to vomit. Moreover, it made me feel sick to my stomach with shame and even more alienated than I normally do.

2: World Mental Health Day is coming up in less than a month, so I’ll do my part to impart some of my wisdom (take that with a pinch of turmeric and maybe demote it to life experience) and see if it helps.

Let’s get to it, shall we?

First and foremost, telling people to check on their friend on the one day of the year when the company you follow on social media tells you to does not make you a good person. Nor does it help raise awareness, because you haven’t educated yourself enough to know what you’re talking about. Had you had the decency (or, rather, awareness and empathy) to look up from your smartphone screen for even a second, you would have realised you could do more by just acknowledging those around you. I’m not saying you should smile at any random feck that falls into your path, but at least take your bag off of the seat next to you so that someone else can rest their weary bones or, indeed, choose whether they’d like to sit or not.

The above is applicable to every day of the year – not just the one. Just like with our physical health, our mental health is also perpetually there, in whatever state it may be. What’s more, the general public’s failure to acknowledge each other in the everyday can actually be the one think that breaks the camel’s will to go on, so to speak. But a nod, a ‘me before you’, a smile or a wave at a neighbour could also be an actual lifesaver for someone whose only thought is that they’re so worthless they might as well do the world one last favour and shuffle aff it.

I must admit, though, this post isn’t fuelled purely by John Lydon’s favourite form of energy, nor by my appallment of how some people use their Instagram account. No, I’ve been inspired by how a recently bereaved friend of mine has been able to truly live in the spirit of ‘what they would have wanted’ in reaction to their loss. Instead of withdrawing and wallowing in their grief, whilst taking their time to properly grieve, they are out there raising money for research and awareness for the cause by continuing their pal’s legacy – ultimately showing the rest of us how we can help prevent more loss and that there is still a life to be lived after death.

If you are able to help, please head over to this JustGiving page where they are raising funds for FACE (Fighting Against Cancer in Edinburgh).

That’s all for today. I shall see you next Tuesday. Until then, do something nice for yourself. Maybe that’ll give you enough energy so that you’ll do something that makes someone else choose to go on, without it feeling like you actually had to make an effort.

Also, here’s a tune that’ll pull at your heartstrings and make you think – whether you know the whole story or not. Then again, who really ever does? The truth is subjective.

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