Is singledom the road to ruin?

Several times a day, I am bombarded with emails promising discounts for all sorts of holiday activities and fantastic members only deals. Having little to no impulse control, I of course click my way through to the virtual promised land of an affordable lifestyle, only to be met by the unmistakable message that I, as a single, child-free adult, do not possess enough value as a human being to deserve such a luxury.

Instead of whisking myself away to faraway lands, I am faced spending another of so many Seasons in the Abyss.

Perhaps a home of my own will turn my existential grief into joy?

I try to apply for a loan to get myself onto the property ladder, since the cost of living and rent prices now far exceed that of the cost of mortgage payments and utilities in Norway, but am denied because the bank fails to see how I will be able to take care of my finances all on my own – despite the fact that I’ve never missed a payment in my life and have managed to save up and present the required equity capital. The property ultimately goes to a two person income couple, or someone whose parents are able to offer their own property as collateral for their offspring’s loan application, who ends up renting out the property to someone like myself to pay off their loan.

In the UK, you can apply for a council tax reduction, if you are the only adult living in a household. In Norway, a similar discount used to apply for single parents, however these funds have been reallocated to an increase in child benefits, as of 2023. What’s more, certain tax benefits are available to those who are married or legally registered cohabitants in Norway. There are no such tax breaks for the singleton.

What then, if you feel the need to escape reality for a bit? I might try to treat myself to a lovely, much needed, holiday, but am discouraged when faced with the fact that I will be forced to pay an extra 20 percent fee for beds not used (which is ridiculous in itself, unless you’ve requested twin beds). And, God forbid I try to book a cruise to Denmark without owning a car or having a partner to fill the other bunk in my cabin. I could have included the names of several package holiday providers here, but it was impossible to find any travel agents offering single person deals, so one can only assume that none of them do.

In short, anyone failing to settle for just any old romantic partner in this country, does not matter to the corporate world. Which in turn, surely, result in people entering into or staying in toxic or loveless relationships solely for economic reasons. Is this sustainable?

Included in the UN’s 17 sustainable development goals, we find that the need to eradicate hunger and poverty, improving health and well-being and reducing inequality are central to the social dimension of the development of society as a whole. Article 22 in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights explicitly states:

“Everyone, as a member of society, has the right to social security and is entitled to realization, through national effort and international co-operation and in accordance with the organization and resources of each State, of the economic, social and cultural rights indispensable for his dignity and the free development of his personality”

(UN, n.d.)

It is our collective dignity, I fear, that is at stake here. With this ongoing single-shaming (a ridiculous fad in an increasingly overpopulated world, that those choosing not to contribute to said overpopulation are being punished), there are instances where I feel some acknowledgement of our existence might be in order.

In particular, every holiday newsletter or greeting card reads ‘to you and yours’, which, quite frankly, feels like a slap in the face. You can’t even be bothered to customise your greeting to spare us from feeling even more alone than we normally would during any holiday that’s even slightly family-centric. Especially since you’re now stuck sitting alone in your rented, insect infested, Fritzl-style basement flat – the only thing you can afford that has an actual bedroom – while everyone else has fucked off on the holiday that you had to forgo because you were unable to justify spending an additional 2000 NOK on the empty space that is to accompany you on your holiday.

How is this fair? In this economy, wouldn’t it make more sense to sell out the empty seats, rather than alienating the undesirables? Left feeling like a burden on society, it is far too easy to dig oneself into the endless hole of depression, which in turn will require some help from mental healthcare professionals, whose work is funded by taxpayers’ money.

Supermarket chains offer family discounts and the option to bulk-buy for cheap, but unless you have a freezer or the metabolism to burn through a gazillion calories a week, most food items would have expired long before a single-person household would be halfway through the doomsday provisions, leading to more food waste and lost funds for the singleton.

Perhaps, if we weren’t denied so many of the potential benefits that couples are seemingly entitled to, we would be less of an actual burden to society?

Or maybe companies could filter their mailing lists a little bit better, so that those of us not meeting their requirements could live in blessed ignorance of the existence of such special offers?

It is time for the corporate world to acknowledge single people as a consumer. Eradicate socioeconomic inequality.

Benefits for all, or no benefits at all.